Do's (and Don'ts) For Supporting Grieving Families

Laura K. Meier
Creating estate, business, and life plans that ensure a family’s complete protection and well-being.



Do's (and Don'ts) For Supporting Grieving Families

Below are some helpful guidelines if you are looking for best ways to express support to anyone who is grieving the loss of a loved one.

For our special clients and friends who have recently lost loved ones, please know how much we care and that we will continue to keep you in our thoughts and prayers.

Laura and Josh


The Best Things to Say to Someone in Grief

1. I am so sorry for your loss.

2. I wish I had the right words, just know I care.

3. I don’t know how you feel, but I am here to help in any way I can.

4. You and your loved one will be in my thoughts and prayers.

5. My favorite memory of your loved one is…

6. I am always just a phone call away.

7. Give a hug instead of saying something

8. We all need help at times like this, I am here for you

9. I am usually up early or late, if you need anything.

10. Saying nothing, just be with the person.



The Worst Things to Say to Someone in Grief

1. At least she lived a long life, many people die young.

2. He is in a better place.

3. She brought this on herself.

4. There is a reason for everything.

5. Aren’t you over him yet, he has been dead for awhile now.

6. You can have another child still.

7. She was such a good person God wanted her to be with him.

8. I know how you feel.

9. She did what she came here to do and it was her time to go.

10. Be strong.



What to Write in a Sympathy Message

1. “We are so sorry for your loss.”

2. “I’m going to miss her, too.”

3. “I hope you feel surrounded by much love.”

4. “Sharing in your sadness as you remember Dan.”

5. “Sending healing prayers and comforting hugs. I am so sorry for your loss.”

6. “With deepest sympathy as you remember Robert.”

7. “I was saddened to hear that your grandfather passed away. My thoughts are with you and your family.”

8. “Remembering your wonderful mother and wishing you comfort.”

9. “It was truly a pleasure working with your father for 17 years. He will be deeply missed.”

10. “Thinking of you all as you celebrate your grandmother’s remarkable life.”

11. “We are missing Anne along with you. With heartfelt sympathy,”

12. “Thinking of you and wishing you moments of peace and comfort as you remember a friend who was so close to you.”

13. “Our family is keeping your family in our thoughts and prayers.”

14. “Holding you close in my thoughts and hoping you are doing OK.”

Source: Hallmark Cards


What Not to Write in a Sympathy Message

1. "I know how you feel.” We all experience and process grief differently.

2. “She was so young.” No need for a potentially painful reminder.

3. “What a terrible loss.” Avoid dwelling on the pain or difficulty of the loss.

4. “You should…” Instead of advice, offer comfort and support.

5. “You will…” Steer clear of predictions about how their grief journey will go.

6. “This happened for a reason.” Even with the best intentions behind it, this thought risks assigning blame for the death.

Writing tip: If you’re still worried about saying the wrong thing, then keep your message very short. The simple act of sending the card lets your recipient know you care.

Source: Hallmark Cards

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